“This is WOFI in Prince William New Hampshire. We now switch to a live report from Hamilton concerning the strange murder in that tiny town this morning.“
ARNIE DEWARS: “Yeah, I wuz in here early droppin’ off some stock from Dewars Lumber, Hamilton New Hampshire. We deliver anywhere in the continental US.”
“What exactly did you see, Mr. Dewars?”
ARNIE DEWARS: “Well, I wuz doin’ some trash pickup.”
” Isn’t it true you were illegally dumping trash on the project so he wouldn’t have to pay the landfill fees.”
ARNIE DEWARS: “Ugly rumors.”
“What happened, Mr. Dewars?”
ARNIE DEWARS: “So I see this work boot stickin’ out of the concrete.”
“I find that hard to believe.“
ARNIE DEWARS: “Believe it Baby.”
“When did you realize there was an actual body in the concrete?”
ARNIE DEWARS: “I could tell by the contours.”
“Come on, Dewars.”
ARNIE DEWARS: “I have an eagle eye. It was a work boot, attached to a leg, honey.”
“I’m not you’re honey, slime-ball.”
“Who was the victim Dewars?”
BUCKY DRISCOLL: “I can answer that question.”
“Get Lost, Dweeb”
BUCKY DRISCOLL: “I’m not dweeb-I’m Driscoll. Bucky Driscoll. I’m a class A certified security specialist.”
” Perhaps you can tell us who’s buried in the cement.”
BUCKY DRISCOLL: ” Classified. We have legal issues here madam-moyzell.”
“Then, you don’t know.”
BUCKY DRISCOLL: “Huh?”
“Who’s buried the the damned foundation, Driscoll?”
BUCKY DRISCOLL: “Oh, tough one? You don’t scare me cream puff. I can take you down with my eyes closed.”
“Do you you or do you not know who’s buried in that foundation, Driscoll?”
BUCKY DRISCOLL: “I ain’t tellin’ you Goober.”
“You are an irascible degenerate who exacerbates a lack of basic civility.”
BUCKY DRISCOLL: “Oh why didn’t you say so? It’s Leo Crowley. Coach Jones’s good friend and team manager.”
“Thank God we can edit this piece.”
So, you think it’s weird that Leo Crowley’s body in a cement foundation? It probably is and the perpetrators of this crime that Jones will track down made one fatal mistake in not securing the boot within the concrete form. I thought it might be interesting to show a slew of idiotic crimes, not necessarily murder.
How about the lady in South Carolina who was bagged for drunk driving. Only one problem kiddies- She was driving he children’s toy car. NO, it’s really true! Chugging along in the little electric vehicle down the road-three sheets to the wind!
Okay this guy in Harlem, I still don’t believe this one myself. As the the story goes the guy simply wanted a tiger cub in his apartment. But Tiger cubs grow into full-fledged, carnivorous adulthood. Yes, it’s true. The African jungle tiger right there in Harlem, in the apartment, living with the guy. PS- he had an alligator too. The alligator refused to have his photo taken.
Listen to this. Two guys fighting over– a woman? Nope. A car? no. The TV. Wrong again… A bag of Cheetos. So what Happened? Murder! Murder over a bag of Cheetos. Give me a break… or at least a Cheeto.
Rapid list of weird locations for the deceased:
Guy drops a cell phone into a papier-mâché Dinosaur leg-then he fell into until found-dead.
Disney Paris employee stuck under It’s a small world ride boat when it accidentally started. Round and round we go- where he stops nobody knows.
Guy on a rabbit hunt falls into a rabbit hole while leaving his dog tied to a tree. The dog survived.
Lady in South Africa, in for a broken leg, found dead in hospital ceiling and no one knows how she got there.
And now back to our story.
When I was on the road in outside sales many times, I called on home builders. I also met a slew of other customers which inspired may of the characters in my books. Jones enters the world of Bobby Bonner Homes, which includes Bonner himself as well as Scott Gleason the job superintendent. There is the sub–Red Kroch who will fight at the drop of a hat. No, I didn’t copy exact characters, but I did exaggerate character traits. And all the Hamilton crazies such as Lark Larsen, Bucky Driscoll, Wendell Harris, Courtney Jefferson and his mother along with the Hamilton regulars Frannie McShane, George Strickland and Father Gallagher are in this book.
And then the murder conspiracy in Murder at the Applegate expands well beyond Hamilton and Prince William which is cool but dangerous for Cocoa and Jones. Distant locale and wider conspiracy.
Robert P. Fitton